Archive for December, 2008

Is there any modern communicators walking the corridors of the Vatican? Clearly, 21st century media advice is in short supply. Was the Holy Father made aware of the dangers in his end-of-year speech to senior Vatican staff? There has been some unfortunate fallout this morning, after his decree that “saving” humanity from homosexual or transsexual behaviour is just as important as saving the rainforests was made public. The take away seems to be that the Pope is spreading fear that gay people somehow threaten the planet. Stand by for his Christmas message, hopefully it will address the real issues that face the world in 2009

“Shoe-throwing man is now his brand–He should be sent all over the world to throw shoes at people we don’t like.”
— Mark Borkowski on how the Iraqi reporter who threw his shoes at President Bush can create tongue-in-cheek commercial gain from his fleeting fame

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What a year it’s been! But now is not quite the time to reflect on that – now is the time to pause for breath, kick off your shoes and relax as the tsunami that is the festive season subsumes you entirely. Enjoy it! You might spend the next few days watching the new Wallace and Gromit and Doctor Who with your family, whilst rolling the fifteenth mince pie you’ve been offered lazily around your plate, debating whether or not you intend to eat it. Or you could be hiding somewhere, away from all festivities. However you choose to pass the next few days, I hope it’s relaxing.

I’ll be back before the year is out with a list of the best and the worst of PR in 2008, but in the meantime, I’d like to leave this sublime piece of advertising with you. When you click on the link below, take time to go through all the options. Relish every detail. Whoever concocted the campaign deserves to be congratulated most warmly!

Click here to find out more.

In previous recessions and downturns, many companies came to realise that the only way to steer themselves away of the maelstrom was to turn to  the steadying ship of good PR. Perhaps Bill Gates’ aphorism – “If I’m down to my last buck, I’ll spend it on PR” – should be embraced as the mantra for the many brands that won’t be able to afford more expensive media alternatives to market their product.

The dilemma facing many companies that are deliberating upon how to communicate in 2009 is being compounded by the cyclone of digital communication options. The Borkowski development director reports a flood of new business materials flying out from beleaguered PR companies all desperate to guarantee work in the coming year. Many of the mechanisms being suggested lack authority and indicate that very few PR companies truly understand how to use the new media in the new era.

The paradox is that the fervent promises being made will have a knock-on effect that will stifle some of the really original and groundbreaking ideas that I’ve seen proffered as a new PR medium, particularly those that are delivered by mobile technology. There is a shit-storm of platforms, many of which amount to nothing more meaningful than a reskinned spam mechanic. The core consideration for brands facing all this is that they will just have to grasp the nettle and recognise that, to fully engage in consumer relationships through digital PR, they have to let the audience play with their brand.

If they’re unable to grasp this simple yet absolutely essential tenet, then the convoluted processes that many PRs feel comfortable in offering will undoubtedly add to a brand’s recessionary malaise.  True innovation is going to be incredibly difficult to sell to those brands that are still confused by the medium. Lame campaigns which just hoodwink brands will obviously fail and, when they do, they will also puncture the enthusiasm for the new mediums that’s been growing in the new PR.

A fascinating article in yesterday’s Guardian, marking the rise and rise of TV merchandising, which started out by accident thanks to Mattel bringing out a range of toys to coincide with Conan the Barbarian that it couldn’t sell, forcing the company to create He Man and the Masters of the Universe and a plethora of toy and TV programme tie-ins aimed at milking parents through the power of the pre-teen nag.

Now, unsurprisingly in the face of a looming recession, TV companies, format wranglers and production companies are desperate to make some dosh whilst they are ahead and still on air. They are motivated by the desperate reality that the time for the precious original spark of love for the show in question is a finite thing and its ability to live in the audience’s heart is diminishing, as more and more product floods the market and more and more marketing aims them towards the next big thing. Hence the panic The Guardian describe to award marketers and licensing agents sweeteners and hefty commissions to quickly create interest with a wide range of products.

“Last month,” the Guardian writes, “Global Entertainment appointed Aysha Kidwai – whose career spans the ad agency JWT and retail consultancy Watermelon – as director of merchandising and licensing.

“’My job is to create products for Corrie, Emmerdale, Hell’s Kitchen and the like that can appeal to all age groups,’ she explains. ‘Next year I’ll be pushing the soaps heavily – gardening features strongly in Emmerdale, for instance, so we’ll be looking at a range of gardening products. For Hell’s Kitchen there’s various kitchen items that you could sell – marketing the complete kitchen solution to bachelors, for instance.’

“But Global is a long way behind BBC Worldwide, which – according to licensing magazine License Global – is the 27th richest licensing body in the world, above the NHL, WWE and Coca Cola. Russell points to In The Night Garden and Charlie and Lola as his key kids properties, but is also pushing into the more adult world with shows such as Top Gear. Last year, an unprecedented joint venture between Worldwide, Top Gear’s executive producer and Jeremy Clarkson turned over £8.6m with products ranging from Scalextric sets to I Am The Stig T-shirts. Clarkson earned £317,000 – which he sadly invested in AIG. This autumn, Top Gear Live began a £20m world tour that will act as a template for other BBC superbrands to hit the road.”

You can be sure, though, that the products that are out there at the moment will be on eBay and at a car boot near you within a few months – from the Carry On Camping picnic set to the ‘I’m a Celebrity’ board game – as the next big thing in TV careers over the horizon and into the lap of the audience

The audience obsession with the next big thing is equally apparent in reality shows, even if the previous participants and the parents of runners up aren’t so aware of this – take the reaction to the X-Factor final on Stephen Nolan’s Radio 5 chat show last Saturday, on which I was a guest.

The father of one the members of JLS took time to suggest that the career trajectory of the passable boy band runners up will be comparable to that of the Beatles and the Bay City Rollers, thanks to a little bit of hysteria in Croydon, which is forgivable given the familial connection and the fact that the final had just drawn to a close. Andy Abraham, runner up against Shayne Ward in the second series, clearly and less forgivably believed that he was still a big star despite the rapid downward trajectory of his career. Steve Brookstein, winner of the first series, remained convinced that all the finalists would have careers in music.

None of them are right on this. Alexandra Burke alone stands a chance taking up regular residence in the spotlight simply because she has an awesome voice and stage presence – to the point that she held her own whilst duetting with Beyonce Knowles. For the rest, I am fairly sure that whatever records they release will be littering car boot sales in a year or two alongside Hollyoaks perfume and Emmerdale gardening products.

For more comment on the X Factor final, click here.

Can you feel the noise? It’s Christmas and there’s no getting away from it, given the inordinate number of Christmas-themed stunts and stories floating inescapably through the ether at the moment. Stuntwatch dons its noise reduction headphones and returns for another look at what PR stunts, dull or delirious, are tickling the media this week. 

The Danish trivia board game BezzerWizzer is trying to bring home the bacon in Britain by announcing the results of a poll looking for ‘the nation’s biggest know it all’. Simon Cowell has been voted into the top spot, according to the Daily Record, beating off Chris Moyles and Jeremy Clarkson. 

Ripley’s Believe it or Not have been getting in on the Christmas action with a tried and tested streak of controversy – they have brought in a post-watershed version of Santa’s grotto and are inviting adults to sit on the knee of a sexy Santa. They are hoping to stir up a fuss similar to the storm in a teacup over Madame Tussaud’s nativity scene a few years ago, featuring waxen effigies of the Beckhams as Mary and Joseph, or Ray Franklin of Frome, who showed soft porn films to adults in Frome, attended by attractive young women dressed as elves, whilst their kids watched Disney films, a move which brought down the wrath of Disney on him.

Perhaps the nicest of this week’s crop is the panto hopeful, rejected at audition 30 times in six years, who has become the Royal Mail’s panto Wicked Queen for their Christmas stamps and who claims to have only discovered this when she went into the Post Office. Quite what the Victorian inventors of the stamp would have made of this rampant commercialism is open to question, but it’s a neat and pleasant story.

The strangest is certainly the story of Cindy the poodle, whose owner Sandra Harkness – a regular on the competitive grooming circuit – has been receiving much coverage for her innovative use of food dye and chalks to transform the poodle into anything from a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle to a camel. Proof, if ever there was proof, of the way animals illicit a response is the fact that she has received hate mail for her campaign to get more attention for her pet grooming parlour in California.

There are a number of clever celebrity stunts worth mentioning; top of the list being the announcement that Colleen Rooney has designed a range of jewellery for Argos and the news that Jennifer Aniston will be appearing nude in next month’s GQ, a well-used trope to get a star a little more attention as their career wanes.

On the duller side of the stunt lies Tresemme, who the Telegraph say have conducted a poll to find out men’s favourite hairstyles on their women (apparently long and curly came out on top) and Yakult’s survey that suggests women don’t eat before Christmas parties to make more room for alcohol. I’m not sure how robust Yakult’s statistics are, but it’s a good way of getting headlines, given that it drags in binge drinking and Christmas. Whether it will create much traction for the brand is another matter. Another worthwhile and thrilling survey has found that men and women enjoy using new technology, according to the Daily Star, whilst the Daily Express tells us that scientists have discovered that we get bored because our brains simply disconnect. Quite.

Three out-of-work, recession-hit Santas were employed by Borkowski for a simple photo shoot for the company’s Christmas card, due to take place this afternoon. Unfortunately, they got thoroughly drunk beforehand and are currently rampaging around the streets of London.

Fortunately, we had a video camera on hand and have been following them as they shout, curse and conga their way through the centre of London, accosting passers by, gibbering, wailing and generally misbehaving. The sight of a pissed up, pissed off Santa sat on his haunches in the middle of London nursing a cigarette like his life depended upon it whilst being barracked by his two Santa buddies until he gets up to dance the conga is one to behold.

This may have started off as a simple Christmas card, but I think we’ve got something better still. And, thanks to the wonders of the internet, you can watch them running amok right now at www.borkowski.co.uk/tv

I was interested to read the latest Bare Feet Studios blog by Roxanne Darling on the need for transparency and new, big, clear thinking in advertising; it chimes in rather neatly with my views on the way PR should work in the coming years.

“This post is part of my desire to both shine light on discrepancies in advertising and to attract people who want to use advertising as a genuine tool to build better customer relationships, products, and long-lasting brands,” she writes.

She is clear-eyed on what has brought about this need for transparency; the internet. She is part of the burgeoning conversation on the web about transparency and empowered users of brands. 

“A powerful global conversation has begun,” she says. “Through the Internet, people are discovering and inventing new ways to share relevant knowledge with blinding speed. As a direct result, markets are getting smarter—and getting smarter faster than most companies.

“So we have this rich, conversational internet happening, and the bloom of social media and social networks almost everywhere I turn. There are incredible opportunities for brand-building and even transactional results. Dell has sold over $1 million worth of refurbished computers on Twitter. More than ever people want to tell their friends about the things they love.”

The more this type of conversation can be encouraged the better, I say. It will be interesting to see what comes of it in the coming months, when recession will make it all the more necessary for people to feel they can trust the brands they are being sold and the people who are selling them.

I hear that Channel 4 has signed bed shop Dreams to sponsor Celebrity Big Brother, which returns to our screens next month for the first time since 2007.

Celebrity Big Brother was “rested” last year following the Shilpa Shetty racism row, so it will be interesting to find out if the show can still interact with the Great British unwashed, drive controversy and keep the sponsor away from the tagline “Bad Dreams”.

The show has, in the past, had controversy embedded at its heart but Channel 4 are going to have to be more careful this time round whilst bearing in mind that it would be a PR nightmare if the show is simply boring and risks courting the accusation that the show sends people to sleep and thus has the perfect sponsor.

I was sent a beautiful and astonishing graphical representation of the cost of the bailout of the American economy yesterday – one that made my jaw tap my laptop’s keys and type out an expressive gasp of consternation when I saw it.

The pie chart in question, below, was posted on the voltagecreative.com blog and is an aesthetically-pleasing version of statistics drawn up by the economist Barry Ritholtz.

Click on the image for a larger version

Whilst one can question the way the dollar prices were adjusted for inflation, there is no denying that this statistic shows explicitly just how much the American economy has been propped up on hope in the last 30 years, and the enormity of the task facing Barack Obama.